Second Annual NBA Festivus

It's been almost nine months since the last time I sat down and put together a Basketball Beeswax article. Honestly, I didn't expect to ever come back to it. I still love this site, but time is becoming more valuable than ever as I approach my 18th birthday. Monetarily, this site is not valuable in the slightest. Sentimentally, it means more than anything. What could be more sentimental than celebrating everyone's favorite fake cynical holiday?

I'm sure you may have questions. What is Festivus? Why hasn't your writing improved after a full year at a professional level? Why did the Lakers sign Russell Westbrook over Buddy Hield? We can find some of the answers in the intro to my last Festivus piece.

"The NBA and the sport of basketball exist within a culture that I proudly try to represent. It's rare that a day goes by without me either watching or playing the game in some way. Despite this, a mind like my own is still able to find a number of issues with the thing it loves most and in the immortal words of Frank Costanza on Festivus Day, "I've got a lot of problems with you people, and now you're gonna hear about it."

For those confused, Festivus is a fictional holiday celebrated by the Costanza family on Seinfeld. The concept behind Festivus is to serve as a cynical counter to the joyous nature of Christmas and the holiday season by providing an outlet for people to express their innermost rage and anger upon family and friends." - Airing My NBA Grievances: An NBA Festivus Special

We’ve arrived at Festivus Day 2021. Believe it or not, I still have a lot of problems with you people (the NBA), and you’re all going to hear about it. I’ll begin this year’s Festivus celebrations by saying that I really do appreciate the changes made to the NBA this year and the product has legitimately improved. My grievances this year will be far more superficial and subjective compared to last year’s which focused on the rulebook and gameplay.

D’Angelo Russell

Ask anyone 21 or under about their favorite basketball player and D’Angelo Russell will come up at least 85% of the time. I just don’t get it. I never have, and at this point, I hope I never will. What is the appeal? Why does a generation of fans idolize a player who has never won anything substantial in his life? It’s troubling. Call me old fashioned, but I like players who WIN. Not ones who put more effort into their celebrations than actually making the shot they celebrate. That’s really the thing about him I guess. People think Russell is cool, and love him because of it. I obviously disagree with this status but I won’t lose sleep over it. If anything, his teams’ perpetual sucking makes me happier than ever.

Mavs Front Office

I’ve attended multiple Mavs games this regular season and every home playoff game last year. Let me tell you, seeing this team in person is way more depressing than I could ever describe with words. Luka is magnificent, nobody questions that. What isn’t magnificent is seeing 4 other guys stand at the three point line watching him dribble the clock out to take a contested shot. The most unfortunate thing about this situation is that it usually works. Luka is too good for his own good. If he were slightly less brilliant it would be painfully obvious that something needs to change with this roster. This unit is a .500 formula, with a second round exit as their absolute highest ceiling. In an era where stars bounce around the league at will, someone in Dallas leadership needs to wake up and realize the generational talent they’re blessed with. Build around him, or you’ll lose him. Don’t mess this up.

The entire Indiana Pacers organization

This grievance is more of a “I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed” level of peeved than the others. I could not even try to explain why this Pacers team is not at least competent. Injuries can’t be an excuse, Turner and Sabonis both haven’t missed a game this season and Brogdon has only missed 6. They have a decent head coach, a great rookie in Chris Duarte, and a lineup that seems to fit together on paper. Why are they so bad? Every starter would be an above-average start on nearly every other team in the league. I just don’t get it. I’ve watched them, and I still can’t understand. They always look good! This unit is the basketball equivalent of fools’ gold, and I’m the fool who believed in it.

Social Media Personalities

There’s nothing that gets under my skin quicker than the “basketball personalities” that comment under every single Bleacher Report or ESPN post. Every comment is some stupid overly-manufactured collection of words. The posts usually go like this. Bleacher Report posts a clip of LeBron throwing a perfect pass to a cutting teammate who scores despite losing the game by 10. Within seconds, we get Mr. Airplane Royce White dropping a

“THIS IS WHAT THE GREATS DO !! FACILITATE AND SET THE TONE! #LEAD”

No, this is not what the greats do. The greats don’t get smoked by Dejounte Murray on a Thursday night at Crypto.com Arena. I know this is such a minute thing to be annoyed at but I cannot handle seeing stupid people comment stupid things under stupid posts while other stupid people like it. I could put out a 5000 word essay about all my grievances with Royce White. For my own mental health, and his, I won’t.